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And Now Back to Our Regularly Scheduled Chastity Blogging March 25, 2011

Posted by Dev in Musings.
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“What happened to Dev?” you might be asking. “She didn’t post for a week!”

Actually, it was ten days. Believe me, I thought about the blog every day, but life—in particular work—had other plans for me.

I am facilitating a big project for a professional organization. It’s a lot of fun but also a lot of work and over the past two weeks it has taken an incredible amount of time (think—every day, evenings, weekends). The good news is that I have managed to stay on track so I am keeping my stress levels under control. The even better news is that the project requires a trip to San Francisco; I’ll be leaving in six days. The best news of all is that Ab is coming with me so we’ll have a mini-vacation. Warm weather, eating out, hotel sex—what more could anyone ask for? Well, Ab might ask for an orgasm or two. We’ll see if that’s in the cards for him. I haven’t made up my mind. 😉

My lack of posting hasn’t meant a lack of chastity, however. Ab’s still a locked boi. Nickels and pennies have been going into the orgasm glass on a regular basis. For Ab, there was a quarter and a franc way back at the beginning of the month but nothing lately. He did take a one-day vacation from his device last Sunday, but not a vacation from being chaste. It was interesting—I saw his Watchful Mistress on the bedside table and I just shrugged. No big deal. A few months ago, I would’ve gotten anxious. It think it’s telling that we’ve gotten to the point where I know and trust that Ab won’t have an orgasm without may say-so and active involvement. I asked him the other day, “Do you miss masturbating?”

“Of course I do,” he replied. “Who wouldn’t?” But missing it doesn’t translate into trying to do something about it behind my back.

I’ve been pondering activities for while we are in SF. I am sure they have much more entertaining toy stores than we have here in Maine. Shopping might be fun—if anyone has any recommendations, please post here. I’ve also thought about a touch of adult entertainment. A million years ago, in Quebec City, we went to a club with “go-go boys” (nude dancing). It was hot and fun and the place was great—a big crowd of men and women, everyone enjoying themselves. I wonder if there is some place like that?

In a different vein, I’ve always wanted to go to the Castro Theater. The day we arrive, Thursday, they will be having a Wizard of Oz singalong at 7 pm! The other option would be to see The African Queen on Sunday afternoon. I really would’ve liked seeing Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure on Friday night but alas, I’ll be working.

I realize I owe my devoted readers some updates—the Fuckzall, Sexy Period panties, and our soon-to-join us new dog. I’ll get to those in the next few days. Right now I need to go to…WORK!

Hugs to all,


It Gets Better March 25, 2011

Posted by Dev in Musings, Reviews.
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Dan (left) and Terry (right) at the book launch in New York City

Back in September, I posted a link to a video that Dan Savage had made with his husband, Terry Miller, in which they reached out to LGBT youth with the message, “It gets better.” From that one video a movement has been born. More than 10,000 videos have been created and are now hosted on the dedicated It Gets Better website. Thousands of dollars have been raised for important causes, including GSLEN and The Trevor Project. The latest initiative in the campaign occurred on Tuesday, when the book, It Gets Better: Coming Out, Overcoming Bullying and Creating a Life Worth Living was released.

I’ve pre-ordered a few books on my Kindle before, but this was the first one I was very excited about receiving. I stayed up until midnight, turned the Whispernet on, and watched it magically download onto my device. So fucking cool!

Here’s the description of the book from Amazon:

Every story can change a life.

Growing up isn’t easy. Many young people face daily tormenting and bullying, making them feel like they have nowhere to turn. This is especially true for LGBT kids and teens who often hide their sexuality for fear of bullying. Without other openly gay adults and mentors in their lives, they can’t imagine what their future may hold. In many instances, gay and lesbian adolescents are taunted – even tortured – simply for being themselves.

After a number of tragic suicides by LGBT students who were bullied in school, syndicated columnist and author Dan Savage uploaded a video to YouTube with his partner Terry Miller to inspire hope for LGBT youth facing harassment. Speaking openly about the bullying they suffered as teenagers, and how they both went on to lead rewarding adult lives, their video launched the It Gets Better Project YouTube channel and initiated a worldwide phenomenon. With over 6,000 videos posted and over 20 million views in the first three months alone, the world has embraced the opportunity to provide personal, honest and heartfelt support for LGBT youth everywhere.

It Gets Better is a collection of expanded essays and new material from celebrities, everyday people and teens who have posted videos of encouragement, as well as new contributors who have yet to post videos to the site. While many of these teens couldn’t see a positive future for themselves, we can. We can show LGBT youth the levels of happiness, potential and positivity their lives will reach if they can just get through their teen years. By sharing these stories, It Gets Better reminds teenagers in the LGBT community that they are not alone – and it WILL get better.

In the days since the book downloaded, I’ve been reading the essays off and on, whenever I have a spare moment. I’ve watched a lot of the videos over the past six months so I am familiar with the type of stories that are told—still they pack an emotional wallop and I find I can only read a few at a time before I need to take a break. But like a hummingbird to nectar, I keep going back for more.

I’m not gay (anyone who regularly reads this blog knows that!) but I was bullied in school—sixth grade was the year from hell. So I know the pain that these authors have experienced and appreciate their honesty and candor in reaching out to young people. As the parent of a bisexual teen, I did everything I could to advocate for her, both in school and out. Fortunately, she went to a high school that was inclusive and accepting. My heart breaks (daily) thinking of children who are scared, fearful, abused, teased—many right in the environment of their very own homes—and who have done nothing wrong except be themselves. I hope they are able to find this book or the videos or both and know that the message imparted is true: it gets better.

This book and the entire It Gets Better project are important. I fully support the work that Dan and Terry are doing and the goals they are trying to achieve. I highly recommend the book; it will remain in a place of pride on the home page of my Kindle (since I don’t put books on the bookshelf anymore!). Please consider a purchase—all proceeds go to LGBT youth projects—and if you can afford it, consider purchasing a second copy to give to a friend, young person, or library. I gifted a copy to my daughter’s high school library. Won’t you join me and do the same?

A Quick Update March 15, 2011

Posted by Dev in Musings.

I apologize for the lack of updates the last few days. Life kicked into high gear right after I wrote my “Luscious Leather” post and hasn’t stopped since. Yikes!

We are looking to adopt a rescue dog that is being fostered in a neighboring state. I have to say, adopting a rescue is akin to adopting a baby! Well maybe that’s an exaggeration but still…We went down to meet her on Saturday. She’s a lovely, sweet dog—just a little over a year old. I hope it all works out.

We hooked our trip down to meet the dog onto another necessary trip  which meant that Saturday we were on the go from 9 am to 6 pm. Phew! Long days like that, with lots of running around, remind me that I am not 23 anymore. Then Saturday night/Sunday morning the clocks changed which wreaked further havoc with my biological clock. All day Sunday I had an upset stomach and felt exhausted. Even yesterday, I hadn’t completely recovered.

As you can imagine, this meant no T&D for Ab and no coins in the orgasm glass for me.

Today I had my butt planted in a chair in a hotel conference room at a day-long retreat. The presentations and discussions were actually interesting so that was a good thing, but I did come home feeling restless—and some horniness was returning. In the mailbox was my eagerly-awaited package from Extreme Restraints. But wait—our daughter was coming home from college for spring break. Damn!!! I didn’t even open the box. No sense in getting wound up if I can’t play with the toys.

The rest of the week—the rest of the month, to be honest—is looking equally busy. Sigh…I suppose it is a good thing that chastity is so totally normal I can’t think of special things to write about and instead, must discuss all the other stuff going on in my life.

And then, I must say, the situation in Japan has me beside myself with unhappiness and sorrow. My prayers and thoughts go out to the people of that devastated nation. I can’t even imagine what it must be like. You wake up on Friday morning thinking life is normal and then normal ends and chaos reigns supreme. It is one of my worst nightmares. In fact, I’ve had bad dreams for the past three nights as my mind tries to process the images and stories that I read in the paper and online.

Anyway, that’s what’s  happening in the Devoted Lover household. I do hope things settle down shortly and we can get back to fun and games but right now I am dealing with busy work, busy lives, worrying about Japan, and having young people at home.

Hugs to all!


For Those Who Love Leather March 11, 2011

Posted by Dev in Musings.
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I am definitely not a fashionista and I usually don’t pay any attention to Fashion Week events in Paris and Milan, but the Fall 2011 collection from Hermès caught my eye. It started with a picture in the Wall Street Journal where they were making fun of the leather pants and boots combo (“poonts”?) calling it “the least practical garment” of all the collections. Seriously, are there any clothes at any fashion week that are practical? Or affordable? I don’t think so. So, why not go all out and drive the leather fetishists wild with top-to-bottom leather: hats, jackets, skirts, gloves, pants, boots, and yes, even poonts. I thought the model with the creamy white poonts and a falcon was pretty hot. I also loved the leather trim on sweaters and jackets, pulling the whole look together. Here are a few pictures for your viewing pleasure. I also found a video of the show, which was held at Hermès Left Bank store in Paris. I read more than one description of the show that said designer Christopher Lemaire “sent models down the runway at a slow, almost meditative pace.” The background music, described as “woo woo” is a performed by a Chinese musician playing a Chinese harp, which we, apparently, would call a zither.

I love the quilting on the bill of the cap and the contrast of silk and leather. Notice the trim on the jacket and oh yes, the poonts!

Here’s a video of the show…

For those who want more, there’s a very nice slide show at the New York Times. You can zoom in on the pictures and really get up close and personal with all that luscious leather. Enjoy!

* * * * *

Meanwhile, over at the Louis Vuitton show there was lots of fetish-y clothing, with leather, fur, boots, see-through shear skirts revealing thigh high stockings, and more. Not really my taste but I can see how it would appeal to some. Ab tells me he wants one of the French chambermaid’s dresses. Something tells me this would cost more than his housekeeper dress from Amazon…

I love the feather duster!

Your Opinion on the DL2K March 10, 2011

Posted by Dev in Polls.
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I had a ton of views on the blog yesterday–not a record, but close–which suggests to me that there is a great deal of interest in the DreamLover male management system. It is intriguing–it is real? A hoax? Is the thing actually shipping or is this a great big scam to separate gullible consumers from their money? Anyway, I decided to create a poll. You tell me…what do you think of the DL2K MMS?

Note that there is an “other” choice but please feel free to leave comments in the comment section, too! I look forward to reading your opinions.

Dreamlover Labs: Shipping Now? March 9, 2011

Posted by Dev in Musings.
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Back in August, when I first discovered chastity and was reading obsessively on the subject, I came across the website from DreamLover Labs. They purported to be developing a male management device to be used in the process of training your male to be the perfect boyfriend or husband. The device would consist of a receiver attached to the man’s chastity device and a remote control, held by the trainer, that would shock him as a way to correct unwanted behaviors. The idea of male management and the use of the device was supposedly based on male management science and theory, operant conditioning principles, and firm foundation of empirically tested techniques from psychology.

Because I like science and am interested in empirical evidence, I gravitated towards the theory section of the site, rather than the R&D posts of developing the device. I remember my reaction the first time I read some of these articles last summer: “compulsory sodomy,” “forced subjugation,” and this statement:

The male’s penis (the symbol of his manhood) is relegated to a locked and forgotten, unreachable place, without a concrete prospect of becoming erect again. Therefore, long-term chastity is more akin to castration.

This is what I could look forward to as an outcome of locking up my husband?

Once I got over my initial shock, I actually put my thinking cap on and did some research. I could find no empirical evidence supporting a theory of “male management science.” I googled the names of some of their experts, including Susanne Liu, MD and Tomomi Kumakura, PhD. What did I come up with? Nothing except references back to the DreamLover site, or other blogs or sites that had referenced the DreamLover site. I began to realize that maybe this is just a great big elaborate hoax—or fantasy. In fact, I found one comment that said the site is nothing but “porn for women,” and realized that might be true. Once I stopped thinking that this male management stuff is an inevitable consequence of chastity and just started reading it for fun, I could see the hotness in it. There is a part of it that appeals to me, sort of like Chirenon’s mounding fantasies and his pictures. Don’t ask me why—besides, I don’t think it’s a good idea to overanalyze one’s fantasies. 🙂

Fast forward six months and DreamLover is blitzing the world (including Ab) with e-mail announcements that their male management system is available for purchase in a limited, first-run production. If you happen to have a spare $1400 in your pocket, you could be one of 57 owners in the US or 27 in the EU/UK. A problem for us is that it is designed to work on the CB-3000 or CB-6000 from A.L. Enterprises—no mention of the CB-6000s, which is the polycarbonate device we have. They describe workarounds for other devices but it is not clear whether or not it would work with stainless steel—I certainly don’t want to electrocute my husband in the process of getting him to be the ideal man! Dead is not ideal in my book…LOL.

Seriously, I’d be very leery of forking over $1400 for an unknown, previously unsold product. But I suppose there are folks out there who would not see this as a financial barrier and will be buying one. If they do, I hope they’ll write about their experiences. I am curious if this is something that will move from the realm of fantasy to reality.

* * * * *

Meanwhile, speaking of limited edition, first run products: my Sexy Period panties are due to be shipped on March 14th. I’ve been invited to the launch party on March 19th and even though it is here in New England (Providence, RI, to be exact) I won’t be attending—it’s just a little too far to drive for a Saturday evening event. However, it’s fun to be part of the excitement, even peripherally, and to see the enthusiasm of these very entrepreneurial young women as they get their business off the ground. They are so much more real and honest, to me, than DreamLover Labs—but that’s just my opinion.

* * * * *

A quiet aside to: Thumper. Welcome back. I missed you during your recent sabbatical. It’s good to have you back, blogging, surveying, and being the all around fun bunny that you are. Your blog was one of the first I found that I read obsessively and now, reading your posts and leaving comments has become a happy habit. I am glad things are back on track.

Also, to Sarah Jameson: Happy one year anniversary to the Male Chastity Blog. This is another resource I found early on and did much to counter the nonsense I was reading at DreamLover Labs. Being a busy blogger myself, I know how much work is involved. Keep it up, Sarah, and congrats on a job well done.

Dev’s Boi March 6, 2011

Posted by Dev in Devices, Musings.
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From time to time over the past few months, I have thought that I’d like to get Ab’s Watchful Mistress engraved. It has a nice flat bar which seemed to be the perfect place for something special: his name, “Property of Dev,” “Dev’s Cock,” or something else. I hadn’t quite decided what. Trouble is, I couldn’t quite figure out how to make this happen. I have a lot of chutzpah but I couldn’t see myself going into the swankiest jewelery store in the city (the only one that still has an engraver on the premises) and say, “This is my husband’s chastity device. I’d like you to engrave it thusly…”

The other night, Ab chided me. “You’re not very observant,” he said. “I’m not?” I replied. “Why?” He showed me his WM. Apparently, he had taken it upon himself to do the engraving, using a Dremel tool! “DEV’S BOI” it says. Perfect! I had thought of boi, done in a fancy script, sort of like this:

but I also like the homegrown look from Ab’s personal touch. Here are a few pictures. You might need to peer closely to see the engraving, but it’s there.

And why isn’t he wearing his WM, you might ask? Two reasons: 1) we had a wild night on Friday, into Saturday morning and frankly, it left us both exhausted (I took a two hour nap in the afternoon yesterday!). Ab put the WM right back on but after a little while, realized he felt sore, so he decided he needed a break. 2) Ab’s doing construction in the bathroom (as I mentioned in my post yesterday, with our trip to Home Depot). Since he’s lifting and bending and carrying drywall, it seemed reasonable to leave it off for the day. He promises that he’ll be back in it tonight and we’ll be back on chastity track.

As for the wild time on Friday and Saturday? Don’t worry, I’m working on a post with all the scintillating details. Stay tuned!

(Un)Safe Sex with a Sawzall March 5, 2011

Posted by Dev in Musings.
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After my post yesterday about the incident at Northwestern University, I wondered if Ab would come home with his Sawzall. He didn’t but he did send me a few links for Sawzall adpaters, designed to turn them into fucking machines or the more colorfully named, Fuckzall. Apparently this is what was used in the demonstration sex act for the optional after class viewing opportunity. How did he know about these and I didn’t? He gave me some vague answer that he read about them on Gizmodo. Um, right…

Maybe I am kinkier than I realize, but I think the idea of a Fuckzall is fucking hot. 🙂 I’ve seen Ab’s Sawzall but I have never held the thing. I wonder how slow it can go? Or how fast?

To cure his cabin fever, he decided to renovate one of our bathrooms. He tore everything out, assessed what he needed and then we headed off to Home Depot to buy paint and a new toilet. He also told me that he needed a new Ryobi drill because the charger on the one we have had died.

Because of his work, Ab owns a zillion tools, power and otherwise. Most of them are at the shop and he brings them home when needed here for a project, but we have a few things that are kept at the house, including this particular drill. I have absolutely no clue what’s what and on the rare occasion I need to do something, like hammer a tack, I ask him for the tool and it appears in my hand. To be honest, the more likely scenario is that I tell him, “That tack needs to be hammered” and it gets done without any other intervention from me. The point is, I don’t have a mental inventory of the tools that we own.

Anyway, because Ab does discuss spending money with me, even though I am clueless about the tools around the house, he brought up this drill. He tells me he could buy a drill by itself or he could be a kit which includes a drill, flashlight, and reciprocating saw. Reciprocating saw? The Ryobi version of the Sawzall? My eyes lit up. “And the saw would be battery powered, too, like the drill?” Yes, he said. Okay, now I’m really interested.

At Home Depot, he finds one version of the drill package that includes the drill, flashlight, circular saw, reciprocating saw and a carryall bag for $149. He’s convinced that he saw one at the other Home Depot (when Ab gets into a renovation project, Home Depot becomes his home away from home) that was only $119 and didn’t include the circular saw.

“Go ahead and buy the kit,” I said, thinking of the Fuckzall adapter I have already ordered from Extreme Restraints. (I told you I thought it was hot!)

“No, no,” he said. All he really needed was the drill and a new charger. He could use our existing flashlight on the charger and he really didn’t need another circular and reciprocating saw. He could buy the drill for $49 and save one hundred bucks.

Damn! No battery operated reciprocating saw.

The kicker was, when he got home he found out the charger for the new drill isn’t the same as the old drill, so he can’t charge the flashlight! WTF!

He tells me that he has a different charger at the shop he can bring home so we’ll still have a flashlight but no battery operated saw. Well, I guess I can always go shopping. 😉

* * * * *

If Ab goes after me with the Fuckzall (although I like the thought of doing him…hee hee hee) you can be sure I’ll be checking and double-checking the device to make sure the saw is off and the adapter is on. God knows that this moron was thinking when he put a rubber dildo over the saw, stuck it in his wife, and then proceeded to shred her vagina to ribbons. From Baynet.com:

On March 9, the St. Mary’s County Sheriff’s Office was notified of a Lexington Park, Maryland woman, reportedly aged 27, who was flown to Prince George’s Hospital for an injury which occurred on March 8, as a result of a sexual act involving the use of a reciprocating saw.  The original 911 call was dispatched as a medical emergency.

A man told authorities that he had placed a sex toy on a saber saw blade and that the blade had sawed through the plastic and severely wounded the woman. Trooper 7 transported the woman to PG Hospital. The case remains under investigation at this time. No word on the condition of the woman at this time.

This was two years ago (2009). I wonder what shape she is now and if they’ve played with the Fuckzall since then? LOL.



Sweet Dreams March 4, 2011

Posted by Dev in Musings.
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His CB is missing!

I love sleeping with my husband. For me, it’s a major bonus of being married—a lifelong slumber party with my best friend. I can count the times we haven’t slept together when we’ve been together on one hand. Sure, we’ve been apart many times in our 32+ years together—I had one job where I was traveling quite a bit—but when we’re at home or traveling as a couple, we’re sleeping in the same bed.

This is why, when I read blogs of women who make their husbands sleep on the floor next to the bed, or in the guest room, or in a cage in the basement, I just shake my head. The latter is usually described as some form of punishment but I wonder who is really being punished? I know that if Ab was down in a cage in the basement, I’d be tossing and turning all night, depriving myself of my much needed rest. This would really be beneficial for one or both of us? I don’t think so.

I mentioned in another post that I was reading GhosTV (another 5-star read in the PsyCop universe, BTW. Highly recommended). The protagonists are Vic and Jacob. They are both tall men, over six feet; Vic is rock-star skinny while Jacob is gym-aficionado muscular. Vic often comments how much he enjoys turning into “the solid wall of flesh” that is his lover. I can empathize. While Ab isn’t as big as Jacob, he is a man with muscles, planes, and angles shaping his body, as opposed to my feminine curves. Like Vic, I like turning into him and feeling him holding me close.

I read another blog that said dominant women shouldn’t spoon with their men—it puts the woman in a submissive position. Seriously, who comes up with these “rules”? Ab can spoon with me all he wants. Again, he holds me close and now I often feel the metal of his Watchful Mistress brush against my ass. Let’s talk dominant, shall we? There he is, caged and loving me, wanting me, and being denied by me. Yes, I think spooning is quite acceptable for a woman in charge. 🙂

My parents slept like Ricky and Lucy, that is, in twin beds. They never had a double bed and in later years, even had separate rooms. This is a mystery to me because they were affectionate with each other and obviously in love. Maybe not a wild, passionate love but certainly one that sustained 56 years of marriage. So I don’t understand how they could give up seven or eight hours of intimacy and closeness every night for their entire married lives. I never asked and I am not going to now—at this point, it’s moot and not really any of my business—but the “sleeping apart” gene is definitely one I did not inherit!

When I was about 12 years old, a new family built a home and moved into our neighborhood. The windows on the second floor were misplaced in relation to the windows on the first floor. Supposedly this was to accommodate the parent’s king-sized bed. I can certainly imagine what was going through my mother’s architecturally-correct mind: “Sex fiends!” she probably thought. “Destroying the fenestration of the house for piece of furniture!” LOL.

While I am hesitant to say “forever” about things—maybe I don’t like to jinx myself—I think it is probably safe to say that Ab and I will be sleeping together for the rest of our lives. That’s a given. Now will he be wearing a cock cage for years to come? Time will tell. 🙂

* * * * *

There is a bit of a flap at Northwestern University, where a professor of human sexuality had an after class demonstration of some kinky sex. Apparently the woman, whose kink is exhibitionism (not too surprising) had her boyfriend get her off with some sort of a device. My newspaper would only call it “a mechanized device.” The Chicago Sun-Times was a little more specific, describing it thus:

The live sex act featured a sex toy that was a modified version of a power tool known as a reciprocating saw, or Sawzall. The tool used at Northwestern featured a phallic attachment in place of the blade.

Sawzall, huh? I want to see what this thing looks like…LOL. I know Ab has a Sawzall and he’s a clever guy…

Naturally, parents and alums are outraged and the president has pledged a full investigation. It doesn’t sound like there is a whole lot to investigate but here we are—sex in America, especially public sex, gets everybody’s panties in a twist. This comment (left on the article at the Sun-Times) sums up my feelings about the whole situation quite nicely:

This is too much for my brain to handle. People who witnessed the demonstration weren’t disturbed by it, but people who didn’t witness the demonstration are disturbed by it. H L Mencken was right: some people are disturbed by the notion that somewhere someone might be having fun.

So true!

* * * * *

I apologize for the lack of updates over the past few days. I’ve been insanely busy this week. The entire month of March is shaping up to be a doozy, to be honest. The good news is, we have a trip at the end of the month to look forward to. Plus, being so busy is helping my cabin fever, which is also good.

* * * * *

Confidential to Harry Haversackers: You mentioned living on the plains in Canada. Many years ago, Ab and I took a two week camping trip and traveled across Canada, via Route 1, from Ontario (Lake of the Woods) to Banff and Lake Louise. We then drove down to Glacier Park in Montana and drove home through the US. We camped for one night in a Provincial Park in either Manitoba or Saskatchewan. It was amazing because we had been driving through miles of flat plains, for hours. The park had a lake that was way down (it almost looked like it had been created by a meteor or something). The lake was good sized with lots of people swimming, boating, and waterskiing. The camping area was very large and nice and looked down at the lake. I can’t remember the name of the park. I have scoured the lists of Provincial Parks and none of the descriptions match my memory of this place. Do you have any idea where we might have been? Thanks in advance!