“Ruined” Orgasm?

I got home from work last night and asked Ab to change the key from the left side to the right (again). The left nipple has always been the more tender one so the key just doesn’t want to stay there long-term.

“I guess we gave each other quite a workout this morning,” Ab said, as he unhooked the clasp.

“Oh?” I said, quirking an eyebrow.

“I was a little sore all day,” he answered, “especially on the left side.”

“So tell me…what exactly was that little squirt of yours? What was going on?”

He shrugged.

“I mean, was that semen? Or pre-come? Or something else?”

“I don’t know…it was just as dark on my side of the bed as it was on yours.”

“Well, what did it feel like?” I asked.

He shrugged again. “It felt like an orgasm,” he said. “Or at least, it felt like ejaculation. Ejaculation without a hard on? Is that an orgasm?”

“I don’t know,” I answered. “Was it one of those ruined orgasms I keep reading about?”

He shook his head. “From where I sit, no orgasm is ever ruined.”

And that’s the conundrum for us. We really don’t get this ruined orgasm thing.

Sarah Jameson writes about it in her book and then in her newsletter a week or two ago, she wrote about a really spectacular ruined orgasm that John had on a Wednesday evening. I read about it, still confused and asked one of my email correspondents if he could offer any insight. He wrote:

It was ruined not because it wasn’t during intercourse but rather because she stopped stimulating him before he actually ‘came’ or had his orgasm. It is hard to explain. Have you ever driven down a ‘weee’ road? You know the one where your stomach king of goes weightless as you crest the little hill. It is kind of like you gather speed toward the hill and just before the crest you let off the gas. The momentum of the car still carries you over the hill but you don’t get the ‘weee’ part. A ruined orgasm is a little like that. Your body still carries you to the point of ejaculation but there is no satisfaction. At all. You can see it. You can feel it spasm. There is just no pleasure. It will leave one very frustrated. And extremely horny still. At this point most men wouldn’t be able to have an orgasm even if they wanted to. The body is spent but the emotion and desire is still there.

So would I desire this? Yes, absolutely. Why? I have no idea. We have done this in the past (way past) a little but my memory of the feeling afterward isn’t very clear.

I read this to Ab and asked his opinion. He said the description and so on was very clear and made sense, but he didn’t think this had ever happened to him. It certainly was not something that was in my mind that we had ever done together.

I wonder if, for non-chastity folks, are ruined orgasms part of their play? Somehow it’s something that Ab and I have been missing all these years? Or is it really an experience that is more-or-less exclusive to the chastity life? Part of the whole tease and denial element of the game?

Comments are welcome. And we still don’t know if the whatever-that-happened yesterday was a ruined orgasm. 🙂

* * * * *

Jailbird Update: As regular readers will know, the JB got locked on (requiring two people and four hands) on Thursday evening. Ab has been wearing it continuously since then…no cleaning breaks, size adjustment breaks or anything else. He says it is quite comfortable. Yesterday his balls were sore but I think that was more an outcome of our vigorous workout at 5 am versus a size or fitting issue. He has commented that the snug fit offsets the extra weight so that has not been a problem (which it was in the big honking Birdcage).

We have a second ring now—1 5/8″ which would be 1/8″ smaller than the one he is in now. Ab looked skeptical and I said that we don’t need to change right now—if he ever needs to change, actually. We’ll see where we’re at on Sunday night.

All in all, I can say that the Jailbird seems to be a very good investment and I think we estimated correctly on the size.