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The Winter Doldrums February 27, 2011

Posted by Dev in Musings.
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9 comments

It’s official. I am experiencing an advanced case of cabin fever accompanied by severe winter doldrums. It snowed on Friday and it is snowing again today. The world is white, the sky is white–the only color is an olive-green pine tree in the backyard and our blue station wagon in the driveway. I am sick of winter! I am sick of walking gingerly, not knowing if there are icy patches under the snow. I am sick of clearing snow off the car every time I go outside. I am sick of  wearing boots, heavy socks, hats, and gloves. I am sick of all of it!

My outdoor shower seems like a distant memory, as does my deck and my porch. Did I really tie Ab to a chair on the porch and tickle him with an ostrich feather? That seems like it was a few lifetimes past–or at least three chastity devices ago. LOL.

As I was surfing the web to find the picture I used above, I came up with a wide variety of cures for the winter doldrums. Some appeal, others not so much. In no particular order:

  • Bake some “Kick Winter’s Ass Lemon Bars.” These sound really good. I just sent the recipe to Ab.
  • Attend a film festival. That would work if we had a film festival occurring locally. Instead, we may go to the movies.
  • Take a bible study class. Uh, I don’t think so. Not my cup of tea.
  • Look at pictures of naked men. Um, yes, this is more in line with my way of thinking. Interestingly, I don’t see many suggestions for looking at pictures of naked women. What’s up with that? Guys don’t get cabin fever?
  • Buy a meat grinder for the Kitchen Aid mixer and grind some meat. ??? Whatever floats your boat, I suppose.
  • Have a party.
  • Dress up in silly costumes.
  • Turn the party into a costume contest.
  • Dance.
  • Hm, we never had guys like this in our hot tub...

  • Meditate.
  • Soak in the hot tub. That would work if we still had a hot tub….
  • Read a good book. Actually, I am doing that. The sixth book in Jordan Castillo Price’s PsyCop series just came out: GhosTV. I have been eagerly waiting for this ever since I buzzed through all the other books in the series last April. I am struggling between reading this book as fast as I can and trying to draw it out and make it last. That’s part of the reason I took a break to write this blog post.
  • Write a blog post. Check.
  • Email an old friend.
  • Call an old friend.
  • Clean the oven. Not for me but this is what Ab is doing!
  • Balance the checkbook. Pay bills. Seriously? This is supposed to cheer me up? LOL.
  • Get distracted from writing the blog post and read an article in Time on sex addiction.
  • Remind yourself that spring is only 22 days away…on the calendar, at least.

* * * * *

Okay, so now we know from the sex addiction article that men, on average, have three orgasms a week. Ha, that’s what they think! Time for a quick check in the orgasm glass since it’s practically the end of the month.

Last month (January) there was 93 cents: 2 quarters, 1 dime, 5 nickels and 8 pennies. This month the inventory is:

  • 1 quarter (an orgasm in the cage for Ab)
  • 4 nickels
  • 7 pennies

52 cents. Not quite as much activity as last month but then this is a shorter month–and we’re suffering from the winter doldrums. And there are still 36 hours before March officially arrives. Anything can happen in that amount of time, right? 🙂

* * * * *

Time for a glass of wine, I think, and more PsyCop reading. In the comments, please share your sure-fire cures for cabin fever. I’d like to know what works for all of you. Have at it!